Misty was a wonder. All day long she laughed and ran around, oblivious to the anxiety and grief all around her, until she got tired and had to pause for a nap. Often I found myself laughing with her as I chased her around in a game of tag, and sometimes Steef and Kynan would join us for bouncer. She made Brennan smile, and she could even cheer up the irascible Reese.

I took Misty to see the soldiers bury her mother, as well as many other bodies found in the nearby forest. Afterward she seemed to be happier. She didn’t quite comprehend what was happening, but I didn’t tell her. I would wait until she could understand.

The day after I found her, I had just convinced her to take a nap and was drying herbs in a storeroom when Lord Benedict approached. Why am I in trouble now? I thought. My mind quickly went through the last twenty-four hours, analyzing my every action, trying to justify why he would bother with me.

“Miss May?”

At least he didn’t look angry. Actually, he looked pleased, which was so uncommon with me that I had to blink to ensure I wasn’t making it up. “Yes?”

“I heard what happened with the wolves yesterday.”

I recalled the brief battle. Oh no. I shot one, didn’t I? “Yes, sir? What about it?” I braced myself for the rebuke that was sure to come.

“I wanted to say good job.”

I blinked. Twice. “For what?” For taking responsibility for Misty? No, we had already discussed that.

“I heard you killed a wolf with one arrow, did you not?”

“Yes sir.” Wasn’t he going to scold me? “I’m sorry, sir.”

“You’re sorry? Would you have rather had the wolf kill Misty and her mother?” He looked puzzled.

“No, of course not. But… I thought I would get in trouble.”

“For saving the life of a youngling? Never! You did what was necessary, and it was heroic as well.”

He certainly had a different way of looking at it than anyone else. “I—thank you.” I opened my mouth to say something more, but stopped.

“What?”

I hesitated. “Are you sure… that I was allowed to? I mean, Reese said I wasn’t supposed to, because I’m a doe.”

He looked thoughtful. “Generally,” he said at last, “does are not warriors, and I understand that. But your situation is different. First, if you had not acted when you did, Misty would be dead now. Second, if you have talent in this area, it would be a waste not to use it. In fact,” he looked me straight in the eye, “I have an offer for you, if you would be willing to take it.”

I was intrigued by his opinions. Was he encouraging me? Everyone else thought I should be discouraged. “What is it?”

“Here at Halfwind, we are privileged to have a brilliant archer by the name of Clay Fletcher. He instructs an elite unit of archers, the Bracers, and he has offered to teach you in addition. You can conform the lessons to your schedule, which I understand is a bit chaotic right now.” He shrugged, raising his hands in the air. “Or you can decline. Your choice.”

I considered it for a long moment, I did. To finally be allowed to practice archery, this skill that had blessed me and plagued me at times. What would it feel like to use it with no condemnation placed on me? But then I realized I had everything I needed right in front of me: an occupation, a place to stay that felt like home more and more each day, friends who were loyal though new, and Misty. Archery had become a form of rebellion against my situation, and I had resisted accepting this new life.

Misty. I focused on her. She was so joyful and bursting with life, taking each day one step at a time and not worrying about tomorrow. I used to be like that, I supposed. I wished I could go back, but I suddenly realized that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t. I would never be able to forget what had happened to my family, or pretend like it never happened. And I shouldn’t try to.

I realized that although I was hurt and would still grieve for some time, if only I would look for the beauty and good in the world around me, maybe I could be more like Misty. Not ignoring, not living in obliviousness of the brokenness surrounding me, but knowing of it and still finding joy. And perhaps I could spread some of that joy to others, the way Misty inspired delight in those close to her.

I glimpsed my future. I could learn to be content here. I would raise Misty, and I might care for other orphans who found their way to this citadel. Maybe I would pass on my love of archery to her, along with my medicinal knowledge.

The thing that really convinced me, though, was Howell. I knew, deep inside, that he would not like how I had been handling my situation. He would chide me, and of course he’d be right, then he’d try to help me fix it. He always succeeded.

I fingered the quiver that never left my side. For his sake, I will move on.

Lord Benedict cleared his throat and brought me back to the present. “Miss May?”

I straightened. “Thank you for this opportunity, sir, but I decline.” I watched his expression change from expectant to surprised. “With your permission, I will continue as an assistant apothecary here.”

He recovered quickly. “Of course. As you wish.” And he bowed and left.

I couldn’t help thinking of all the what-ifs, but a strange sense of peace filled me. After Misty woke from her nap, we had lunch with Reese. I was watching them, Misty settled on Reese’s shoulders, pulling on his ears and laughing, when one of the newcomers in line for food caught my eye.

I looked again, and recognition flickered inside me. No, it’s not him. It’s not even possible. Misty said something to me, giggling, and I was just about to turn back to her when the buck turned his head and saw me. His eyes widened.

Breathless, not bothering to stop the tears of joy running down my fur, I jumped up and ran straight into Howell’s arms.

~ THE END ~

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I hope you liked the story! A big thank you to everyone who stuck with me this far. It was the first story I've ever shared, so it was kind of to assess where I am, as far as writing goes. Feedback would be greatly appreciated. Also, this was my first time writing in the first person. It was really fun!

My place beside you,

Eliza