So folks have probably picked up on the fact that I’m a fan of the Lord Captains, the late comrades of my main rabbit Helmer. #LastLordCaptain #BestLordCaptain They’re an intriguing group of characters, and we know next to nothing about them. Until or unless S.D. Smith writes more about them in a future book or series, of course, there’s little to do but speculate. Being all about the speculation, I thought it’d be interesting to start a thread about it.

So apart from Helmer there were six Lord Captains under King Jupiter: Fesslehorn, Gome the Agile, Harlan Seer, Perkin One-Eye, Pickwand, and Stam the Stout. Fess, Harlan, and Stam went missing on an expedition to find True Blue, while the other three are implied to have perished during the afterterrors. Given that Garten Longtreader and Morbin made arrangements for Helmer, Wilfred, and the army, it seems likely that they planned to get rid of the Lord Captains as well. Given the implied skill of the Lord Captains, of course, I doubt they went down without a fight.

Just what kind of fight they might have put up, and against whom, are what I’d like to discuss. Now, S.D. Smith has been pretty diligent about sticking to “RabbitsWithSwords” and “RabbitsWithBows”, with the occasional dagger, pickaxe, and mail thrown in. But given the implied crazy elite warrior nature of the Lord Captains, I like to imagine that they might have mixed things up a bit-aside from Helmer, at any rate. Some ideas I had:

• Perkin One-Eye: as the apparent “coolest of the cool guys”, I could see him wielding two swords at once.

• Harlan Seer: given what we saw of Tameth, I imagine Harlan using a staff.

• Gome the Agile: given his title, I imagine Gome as kind of the Jo of the Lord Captains. He could have been a stellar archer, but perhaps not the best swordsbuck.

• Stam the Stout: with a name like Stout, I figure this guy was kind of like Burnley of Blackstar Company or Master Mills. A big dude needs a big weapon, so I could see him being the Gimli of the bunch and rocking one gnarly battle axe, or perhaps a maul.

Fesslehorn and Pickwand have me stumped; too little info about them for me to speculate on their armaments. However, with an eye at giving these guys and the series’ antagonists some more lore, I have some thoughts on how the Lord Captains might have fallen:

• Perkin was presumably in First Warren during the afterterrors. I figure he may have run afoul of fellow monoculus Redeye Garlackson. Or, given his history of surprising eagles, he may have been targeted by Gern of the Six, architect of the afterterrors.

• Fesslehorn had left First Warren before King Jupiter’s betrayal, and I imagine he and his comrades had an unpleasant surprise or two waiting for them. With how troublesome the Lord Captains undoubtedly were to them, it wouldn’t surprise me if one or two of the Six, like Vardon and Shelt, intercepted them on their travels.

• Gome is implied to also have been in First Warren, so I’d guess he may have fallen prey to Redeye or one of the Six. It’d be kind of poetic if my speculation that he was an archer proved correct, and Jo unwittingly avenged him when he took out that unidentified hawk in Ember’s End.

• Harlan was out with Fess and Stam, and presumably met their fate. As a somewhat older buck-he’s also remembered as “the Wizened Warrior”-I doubt he would have given any of the Six much trouble. Perhaps it was instead his lot to meet General Flox in Battle?

• Pickwand also appears to have been in First Warren during the afterterrors. I rather imagine Falcowit was involved in those events, and one of his crimes may well have been the killing of Pickwand.

• Stam was along with Harlan and Fess, and I figure he may have fallen to one of the Six as well.

In Ember’s End, Helmer asserts that no one could defeat one of the Six in single combat. It seems to me that his claim would bear a lot more weight if Natalia’s best warriors had tried and failed. As for the wolves, I figure Redeye and Flox must have done something to earn a fearsome reputation and the unique rank of general, respectively. This may, in fact, be part of why the Lord Captains fell: to allow a new generation of heroes to rise who would vanquish the foes that they could not.