We traveled at a quick pace all day, drinking as we walked if we were thirsty, never stopping for fear someone might catch up to us. Twice we heard howling from different directions, which made it seem like we were surrounded and there was nowhere we could go that would be safe. Truthfully, I didn’t believe there was a single safe place in Natalia anymore.

As night fell, the group moved off of the trail and into a thicker part of the woods. It wasn’t the most comfortable for sleeping in, but it provided cover in case any enemies should pass our way. I accepted food and a blanket offered by Kynan and curled up at the base of the tree, a bit farther off from the bucks. I had learned their names as we traveled that day. Reese was their leader. There were a couple of brothers, Willem and Steef, who were older than I but younger than Reese, and seemed in good spirits, teasing each other, but not foolish enough to joke about our situation. A quiet buck named Brennan appeared to be a soldier, as he kept his hand on his sword and his movements were precise and direct. Then there was Kynan, who was friendly and at ease even with Reese, of whom the rest of them were in awe. Reese put up with him, too, which made me wonder if they had already been friends before this group assembled on the way out of First Warren. They each respected one another, and Reese’s authority was undisputed by all. I assumed this was because no one could afford to fight about such things when they were trying to survive.

My thoughts grappled with each other in the dark as I waited for sleep to come, not really expecting it but maybe hoping. I felt like a traitor, leaving my village and now all of the Great Wood. I wasn’t sure I could’ve helped, but I felt that I should’ve tried anyway. Somehow life didn’t matter if I was just going to hide. I wanted to help someone, if it could in any way release the heaviness that had settled over me from the moment I made the choice to run. At the same time, I felt awful for wanting to help someone because it might ease my mind, and not solely for the sake of helping them. I groaned into my blanket, trying to ignore the persistent thoughts, and finally sleep came, gradually as if begrudging me any comfort.

I woke early like the day before, determined to talk to Reese. I sat up and watched as Willem and Steef took out food, and Brennan packed his bag, ready to go before the rest of them. I had no bag, no belongings except for the clothes on my back and my bow and arrows, which lay on the ground next to my blanket. The arrows were fastened in the quiver, but I refused to look at it.

Reese was on the ground looking at a map and discussing it quietly with Brennan, when I approached. He looked up, saw me, and told Brennan to get the others ready. “What is it?” he asked, a bit gruffly.

I hesitated a moment, figuring out how to word my thoughts. I thought he might appreciate a more direct method. “Were there any still in First Warren when you left?”

He tilted his head to one side, squinting up at me from where he sat on the ground. He stood slowly and never took his eyes off me. “Why do you ask?”

“I want to know.” This was not a very good reason, as I would only ask if I wanted to know, but it was all I would give him.

After a moment, he said, “There were many lying dead in the streets, but more still were trapped. Inside buildings or not, it didn’t matter, as just being in the city meant they couldn’t get out. The wolves were everywhere, burning buildings, slaughtering rabbits, and laughing at their deeds. Birds circled above, swooping in and screeching.” He paused a moment, as if recalling, then continued. “I tell ye, them bird calls were something. Enough to kill a buck, if ye let it get to ye. There were screams, and howls, and the smell of blood…” He closed his eyes, grimacing. “I was lucky, as I’ve told ye before, to get out. I managed to escape before the majority of them came, so I fought a couple and slipped past the rest.”

“But there were still rabbits left, alive, in the city?”

“Yeah, I suppose.” He glared at me, as if daring me to acknowledge that fact.

“So why didn’t you go back?” I held my breath, waiting to see what his reaction would be. Had I gone too far?

Now he seemed to think I was crazy. “Go back? Are ye daft? Why would I do that?”

“Because there were rabbits, does and younglings, left alive. You should’ve helped them.” My voice was raised and my heart was pounding. Without really meaning to, I had taken out my anger towards myself on him.

Instead of yelling at me, like I half expected him to, he was silent for a long time, not meeting my eyes. He sighed heavily and finally spoke, sounding subdued and sad. “I had a little lassie – well, not so little anymore. I’d say she was about your age—” here he looked her up and down— “and a sweeter, gentler girl you’d never find. But she could get riled up.” He grinned fondly. “She stood up to me, and I deserved it. Her eyes would light up, and I never was sure if she was truly angry with me or just teasing me because she could.” His expression changed, his face taking on a cold, almost emotionless look. His words were flat, hollow as he went on. “I watched her get ripped apart by a beast of a wolf, right in front of me. There was nothing I could do, and it was the same for everyone. The only thing was to run. Nothing I could do.” He trailed off, his voice getting gruffer by the second, and he looked at the ground.

I took a step back, my heart tearing in two at his story, and balled my fists. I should’ve gone back anyway. I should’ve tried. I wish I was justified by his words, but instead I felt as if it didn't matter. My life was a waste if I couldn’t save the ones I loved. But after all, there was nothing I could do, right?

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Sorry this chapter didn't have much action. The next one will! I'm going to try to write one chapter a week.